Loneliness by Amy Gadomski

I don’t know one person who hasn’t struggled with the feeling of loneliness. Loneliness is a condition that is hard to deal with, especially after one’s father has left. Once someone starts to feel alone, they slowly begin to isolate themselves from friends and family. At some point in your life or maybe even today, you have felt alone. Being left gives you a feeling as though there was no one to turn to or no one to cheer you up; when actually there has been someone all along. The Holy Spirit who lives in you will never leave your side. He is always with you and will prevail even through the hardest of situations. He is our rock and our salvation, according to Psalm 18:2.
 
This condition of loneliness is often fed by our lack of trust in God. Much rather than focusing on ourselves and the issue at hand, one could overcome loneliness through prayer. Prayer is the most powerful form of communication with our Heavenly Father and if not done, it can create an absence of acknowledging God’s Spirit. Can you do something for me? Right now, I want you to pray. I want you to first pray for God’s grace He shared with you, by having His very own Son die on the cross for you. Then I want you to pray for your family as they are dealing with the absence of their father. Then ask God to give you strength and the reassurance that He is always with you and realizing that you are never alone. After you’ve prayed for each of these, I’d like you to also pray for your Dad. This may seem unreasonable, but it is much needed. In order to overcome your loneliness, this is a crucial step that is needed for you to grow. Pray for your earthly father. Will you do this for me? Pray.
 
Let’s get to the point… everyone wants attention. That’s how God made us. We were made to form communities and love each other. Even though it seems as if you are alone and there is no one with you currently, just realize that God is always with you. He will never leave you! Continually throughout the Bible, we see God’s reassurance that we are not alone. For example, in Deuteronomy 31:6, it says, “Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.” Again, we see in Isaiah 41:10, “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.” When my father left my family, I felt so alone. Even with three older siblings and my mom, I felt like no one cared for me or even had the time of day for me.
 
-Amy Gadomski
 
Amy is an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about her.


Godly Love by Tony Polous

Love in our society today is something that has been manipulated and changed. I would like to tell you a little bit of what love truly is. Love is not just a reaction that you feel when something good happens to you. Love is so much more than that. First of all, we learn in 1 John chapter four that God is love and we would have no idea of what true love is. In 1 Corinthians chapter thirteen, we get a really good description about what love is and does. Love is not something we just feel or a concept that we understand. It is something that can be acted out. In this chapter, Paul teaches us that love is unconditional. In verse four, we find out what love is. Love is patient, love is kind, love dose not envy, love does not bring vain glory to itself, and love is not prideful.
 
First, I want to talk about how love is patient or longsuffering.  One great example of this is how God has been faithful throughout all of time to us. He has always kept His promises to us, unlike us humans who had to just keep one promise to God, yet we could not keep it. As a Christian, if you profess that you love someone, then you have to realize that you must love them the same today as you will tomorrow.
 
Secondly, love is kind and there are plenty of examples of how God has been kind to us; primarily, by sending His only begotten Son to this world to die for us and to take the punishment for our wrong doing. God did not have to give us a second chance, He could have left us on our own and He would have been right to do so, but He did not. His love was patient and it was kind. Do we love others as God loved us? I would have to be the first one to say that I sometimes fall short of this command. For a long time while I dealt with fatherlessness, I did not feel truly loved. I felt as if it was my fault or something I did that made others to stop loving me, and this ultimately led me to start thinking that no one really loved me. It was only once I met God and got to know Him better by reading the Bible did I truly understand what it meant to be loved. Maybe that is you today. Maybe you feel as if you have not been truly loved by anyone. God is waiting for you; let Him love you. So I beg you to give God a chance and let Him teach you how much He really does love you and how that love will never change. After all, He said in Malachi, “I am the Lord, I change not.” His love will never give up on you because His love is patient and kind.
 
-Tony Polous
 
Tony is an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about him.


How to Forgive Your Father by Amy Gadomski

Jesus saith unto him, “I say not unto thee, until seven times: but, until seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:22). In this passage, Jesus is instructing Peter to not only forgive people seven times, but seventy times seven. So, this must obviously mean we are to forgive people a total of 490 times. You’d better start keeping a tally board then. In all actuality, this is not what Jesus quite literally meant. Jesus is instructing Peter to forgive others as many times as needed. Through God’s grace and willingness, He gives Christians the power to not only forgive those who hurt others, but those who have hurt us as well—for example, someone such as an absent father. Throughout Matthew 18 does Jesus tell Peter that it is easy to forgive others. At times, forgiving people like your father may seem nearly impossible. After all he has done to you and your family, it seems as though he is unforgivable. While this façade may seem like the truth, it actually isn’t. Your Heavenly Father, who died on the cross for you, also died on the cross for your father. Though your earthly father may have brought you much pain, it is quite necessary to forgive him. By doing so, this will help you grow and live through the pain and it will allow you to live your life without hatred or ignorance. Like Peter learned from Jesus, there will be a time when you will be hurt by someone. When this day comes, it is your job to keep an open heart and mind to what God is instructing you to do and how to react. God calls us to be doers of the Word, not hearers. So, let us stop just nodding our head in mental assent to forgiving people, but actually go out and forgive people. Forgiveness does take time and because of this, we should continually rely on God through prayer and supplication. As a result, God will help you to forgive even the most unforgivable of people, which may be your dad. Follow Jesus’ instructions and go out and forgive those who have caused you pain. You may feel better than ever before.
 
-Amy Gadomski
Amy is an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about her.


Your Source for Affirmation & Approval by Amy Gadomski

After a father has left, most girls begin to lose sight of what true love is. Without a father figure in one’s life, the idea of love can often be misunderstood and seen as something based entirely off emotions and physical attraction. Often, this confusion leads to the fatherless daughter trying to obtain this “fatherly love” from a boy or friends. While this might not seem like a bad thing, it actually can form an unhealthy relationship between a fatherless daughter and others. Rather than having a father to lean on and look to, she may start to look to her friends for support. This then can lead to the fatherless daughter seeking approval and affirmation from the wrong people. This is an unhealthy relationship and is not what God intends for you to face. Losing a father is tough, I would know. It happened to me. As a fatherless daughter, I made this same mistake. I tried finding someone who would love me just as much as my dad would have. Whether it was from friends at church or school, I lost sight on having a healthy relationship with some people. I looked to everyone and anyone—everyone but my Heavenly Father God. Even though the Holy One was always there for me, I still chose to disregard this reality at times. This mistake to forget about how strong God’s love is, is what led me to looking for affirmation and approval in all the wrong places. As I grew older and began to become confident in myself, I began to realize that God is love. He created love and He is the definition of it! Rather than looking to others for love and attention, all I had to do was look to Him, the author of love. Today, come to terms with whom you seek affirmation and approval from. If it is anyone, but God, then you might need to start improving on these relationships. The only affirmation and approval you need is from your Heavenly Father, not your family, not your friends, and not even your absent father.
 
-Amy Gadomski
 
Amy is an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about her.


Finding Confidence Without Dad by Tony Polous

Finding confidence in yourself in todays world is quite the challenge and trying to find it without the help of a father or father figure is almost impossible.  In 1 John 2:13 one of the father’s jobs is to protect their children from the evil one. So, when the father leaves the home it leaves the child that much more vulnerable to attacks from Satan who is called the evil one. We know John is talking to earthly fathers because he uses the Greek word “patēr” which means a male ancestor. One of the ways that fathers can protect their child from Satan is to grow their confidence and help them build their own identity.
 
For me, growing up with occasional visits with my dad helped my confidence in ways that really stand out. I think that no matter who you are while you are young, you want to have a person that is just like you.  It gives you some clarity about who you are as a person or your identity. At the same time, I can also see how not having a father figure affected how I developed confidence. After my dad left, when I was a preteen, it really changed everything because I started basing my confidence on my accomplishments. Those accomplishments were trying to be the best at everything no matter what it was sports, tests, or even video games. I became very competitive and I thought it was boosting my confidence but it was just boosting my ego. That path only leads you to a huge ego and pride which is not healthy for a Christian.  A healthy balance of confidence without a dad can only be attained by digging into Scripture. I cannot express how vital Scripture is to developing confidence. Many times having confidence in yourself gives you a peace of mind which then allows you to not have to worry about your self-worth. That is the same exact thing that Paul talks about in Romans 5 when he says, “Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:” What Paul is saying here is that the only way for us to have true peace in life is through Jesus Christ. In the second verse, he says we can “rejoice in hope” and the Greek word that Paul uses is the word “elpis” which means “joyful and confident expectation of eternal salvation.” The hope referred to here is a different type of hope it is eternal hope it is one that never changes just like the God who gave it to us.
 
I believe that if you are fatherless that the only way to have true and healthy confidence is in God and the only way to have confidence in God is through not just reading of scripture but also the application of it.  If we take and apply what Paul is saying to us in chapter five of Romans we will have experienced true confidence. This is what Paul is saying in verses 4-6 “And patience, experience; and experience, hope And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.” I can remember learning all this and the weight it lifted because it taught me that if I find my confidence in myself and my own merit that it will never be enough. Once we find our identity in Christ it changes everything.
 
-Tony Polous
Tony is an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about him.


Abandoned, Scared, and Trembling by Sara Valin

Abandoned, scared, and trembling, I remember it as if it were yesterday. Another sunrise seemed only to bring more anxiety and worry. During my elementary and middle school years, I shared a home with my two biological parents. Similar to other children back then and now I lived with an alcoholic. From the time my father woke up, till he laid down at night, my father would be drinking alcohol. While I watched my father drown himself in the harmful substance, my mother took on all parenting responsibilities. Thankfully, my mom found her meaning in life and the maker of life when I was 6 years old, and we started going to a local church. In the midst of the danger, verbal abuse, and pain, my mother reminded me where peace comes from – Jesus. As my dad raged with anger, punched walls, and soaked in his tears of depression, I would pray under the covers in my room. My father was invited to my school and church performances, but would never attend. I was able to find rest at my church, and had found a family that not only stood by my mother and I, but also wanted to improve our lives. Before my biological father left in 2012, I was struggling. What was amazing though, was that God provided a constant peace and serenity in my life. I knew it was going to be okay because Jesus says in Hebrews 13:5 that, “and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” I also realized that God gave me my perfectly imperfect life for a reason, and he was using my testimony to magnify his miraculous power. Most importantly, I was reminded that through it all, I will always have a dad. A dad that will lay down anything for me. A dad that will always claim me as his, no matter what I do. A dad that will set the example for me to follow. God is my dad, and I encourage you to believe this too, no matter the current relationship you may have with your earthly father. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy in life. In fact, there will be times of fear and desperation. Even after my parent’s divorced and my home life became more peaceful, doubts still ran through my mind. I recently had to watch my mom divorce my stepfather, due to unhealthy conditions. I am saying this because, no matter what your earthly father may be like, you will always have God as your father, your “dad”. When you let God hold you, he will be everything you have always wanted. You will realize that, you are not labeled “fatherless”, but a “Child of God”.
 
-Sara Valin
Sara was an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about her.


Finding Security in God by Amy Gadomski

Today we are told to find security in our jobs, home, and family. When in fact, we should be looking somewhere else for security. Our security is found in Jesus Christ, not anything from this world. In order to find this security and obtain God’s peace, we must look to Him for hope. In Psalm 62:1-2 it says, “Truly my soul waiteth upon God: from him cometh my salvation. He only is my rock and my salvation; he is my defence; I shall not be greatly moved.” (KJV) In these verses David explains through images what God’s security looks like to us. David depicts God as a rock. What traits of God come to mind when David uses this analogy. I think of God as being steadfast, unmovable, and unchanging. Knowing my Heavenly Father is a rock comforts me and creates a sense of security in my life. Not only is God our rock but He is our salvation and defense. When we are in need of being rescued God will always be our fortress. Through him we can find rest, peace and security. We as Christians must learn to put our trust in God and not the things of this world. By doing so, we will find security in Jesus Christ and live a full life. At the end of this passage David says this, “I shall not be greatly moved.” Here he depicts having security in God. Since He is our rock, our salvation, and defense we can feel secure. Nothing in this world can take us away from the palm of His hand. Once we accept Jesus Christ as our Savior we will always be safe and secure. Our security will no longer we found in our jobs, our homes, or our families. Our security will only be found in God.
 
-Amy Gadomski
Amy is an intern and contributor to God is my Dad.  Click here to find out more about her.


Forgiveness – A Fatherless Guy Forgives His Dad!

Do you struggle with forgiving your dad?  I completely understand!  In fact, I hated my dad for years but had to come to the point of forgiveness in order to grow in my relationship with God and to move on with my life.  
 
In this video I share my story of forgiveness.  I encourage you to do the same!
 
You can forgive!
-Pastor Sean Teis
 


Question: Smoking

I was asked by a teen how to tell his friends that he didn’t want to smoke even though they were pressuring him to do it.  Do you struggle with peer pressure in this area too?  Here is some advice.
 
Your Friend,
Pastor Sean Teis
 


Dealing with Inferiority – Embrace Your Awesomeness!

Do you ever feel inferior to other people?  I know I have.  Without having your dad in your life there are a lot of things that you may have not learned that he was supposed to teach you.  There could be a huge number of things that you feel inferior about.  
 
Today is the day to overcome that inferiority and embrace your awesomeness!  In this I talk about how to overcome your feelings of inferiority (thinking that someone is better than you) and how to embrace your awesomeness, that it right, your awesomeness, because you are awesome!
 
Your Awesome!
-Pastor Sean Teis